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Archive for January 2008



A Chlorine Induced Thought For The Evening

Posted on Tuesday 29th January 2008 at 00:00
Whilst swimming lengths in a crowded pool earlier today I had a revelation about why so many people give up an hour at a time to swim up and down the same stretch of water, unable to go anywhere because of the number of people all around them:

It has nothing to do with wanting to get fit, it's actually a subtle form of speed dating!

I was in an adult only lane swim at my local pool for about an hour and was unable to get up any sort of speed because of the huge number of people there, blocking up the lanes. I was so bored that, with a little bit of observation I was able to work out the whole process of initiating these watery romances.

1. Person A will scan up and down the lane adjacent to their own until they find someone they like the look of, who we shall call Person B.

2. Person A will briefly swim alongside Person B and will 'accidentally? make physical contact with them. This is best done at the end of the lane, whilst both Person A and Person B are turning round. The contact should be harder than a brush, but softer than a kick: a brush is insignificant enough to be ignored and a kick might hurt Person B and ruin any chances of future friendliness.

3. Person A stops to apologise to Person B. This is the point at which compatibility is assessed. If Person B isn't interested, they will brush off the apology and swim away without a second glance. If on the other hand, they like Person A, a smile and a few words may be exchanged.

4. Person A swims off but controls their speed so as to ensure time for a smile and a nod to Person B when they next pass each other.

5. Person A swims alongside Person B and begins a more in depth conversation. If sufficient charm is used then it can generally be assumed that Person A and Person B will be practicing at making babies before the evening is out.

Needless to say your humble narrator barely managed an inarticulate 'sorry? with a mouth full of chlorine before being left behind clinging to the side of the pool.

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Bite Size Blogs

Posted on Sunday 27th January 2008 at 00:00
Recently I've been finding (perhaps because of my work schedule) that I'm far more interested in the items on my feed list that are, shall we say, bite size. Either laziness or a lack of time during the day has driven me away from long winded posters (though I do still read every post they write) into the arms of those who rarely put more than a couple of paragraphs out into the world at any one time.

Among these are my favourites of all: comic strips. I refrain from saying web comics because some, such as Dilbert and Peanuts, originated in the ancient world of newspapers, whatever they were. The following is a list of RSS Feeds that each make just one minute of my day that bit more enjoyable for their tiny existence:

Dilbert
Geek And Poke
Peanuts
Private Secret Diary
Quote of the Day
XKCD


Each of these is well recommended for anyone wanting to combine regular updates with still having time to do other things. For those of you with more time, why not check out some of the links on the right hand side?

I'm musing on the idea of finding something short that I can do here on a regular basis, to fill in the gaps when I don't have time to write longer updates. I can't do a web comic unfortunately, because I can't actually draw (the owl on the right of the screen took several hours and nearly killed me), but I'd like to try and find something that I can do quickly, with very little fuss and which will keep my readers entertained.

If anyone has any ideas about a short, regular feed they'd like to see, then why not tell me about it in the comments box below?

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Another New Year

Posted on Wednesday 2nd January 2008 at 00:00
Well, 2007 ended and 2008 began.

Perhaps not my most inspired opening line ever, but at least I am writing something, which makes a change these days. Actually what would make a change is if I wrote a blog post that didn't complain about my lack of blog posts for once.

Sadly though there is no getting away from the fact that I didn't post during December '07. Not once. I've been rather unhappy as of late, what with too much work, nowhere near enough sleep and a general feeling that I'm selling my soul for a measly wage and very little time to do the things I enjoy with my life. Every week it seems I get out of work in just enough time to do the housework and go to bed. Sure it is nice having a little money, but right now I feel like my quality of life has fallen through the floor.

So, 2007 in brief then. At the start of the year I was living in a student house with H and J and working 2 days a week for Catering Services at my university whilst working on my degree. Over the summer I moved out and into my first ever apartment, where I now live by myself. I bought all my own furniture and had a great few days and weeks making this place my home.

In September my two day a week job became full time and is now between 5 and 7 days a week, the lesser end being my preferred working hours. To compensate for this, the full time degree became part time and will now take me an extra year to complete.

I didn't holiday at all this year, in order to put the spare cash into moving home, a decision which I still stand by. Unfortunately my increased working hours make me feel that I need one more than ever, which clashes with the terms of my employment, ie that I don't get holiday pay at all.

At the beginning of 2007 I was single and nothing had changed by the end of the year.

So to 2008. I don't expect much to change unfortunately, as until I finish my degree I am trapped in my current situation. The job will continue to be mundane, poorly paid and unnecessarily tiring. What may change though is me ability to cope with this progression into the real world. Right now I'm in a strange place where I can either work or do the things I want to do. This year I want to do both.

Blogging should become a daily activity once again. So should Twittering, answering my emails and keeping on top of my feed list. Some form of exercise would also be helpful, though that has been the case for years and doesn't look like changing.

If I have one goal for the coming 12 months, it is to squeeze into my day what everyone else manages to squeeze in. There are 24 hours in each of the 366 days that 2008 has in store for us, and I really want to get the feeling that I'm not wasting any of them anymore.

If I let the system get the better of me, I shall become nothing more than a worker. Bar tending is not my life. My life is what happens when I leave work each day, and those are the hours I want to learn to embrace.

If there were a God, I'd ask Him to make 2008 the year that I learn to fit it all in.

Happy New Year everyone!

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